First Weekend of Holidays...

Friday, 21st May 2010 - I hadn't recovered fully from my sickness yet though the sore throat was no longer there but there was a lot of phlegm and I kept on coughing. I had an event to attend today with two new friends at 2pm. For lunch, I went to I-Avenue to have my lunch with Auntie Yang, Ms. World and Tin Chai. Why I-Avenue? Because, I was told by Auntie Yang that Ms. Global refused Queensbay Mall since many lunches were already spent there. Fine, we made a change, in the end, Ms. Global couldn't make it. Global Global, I'm so gonna kill you at first sight the next time I encounter you.

Wine Chicken Rice (RM10)

Then I was off to Queensbay Mall to attend the 2pm karaoke session at Neway. It was my first time to Neway in Penang and it'd just opened not long ago. The last time I went Neway was in KL with Super Lenglui & gang. I can say that I'm a little disappointed with Penang's Neway, but maybe because it's still new. However, the rooms were quite small and I had to squeeze my way into the seat. However, what was more disturbing was that one of my new friend, wasn't really hygienic. His hands were still oily as a result of KFC aftermath but kept grabbing my new white t-shirt. OK, it's gonna get dirty anyway but hey, it was my first time wearing it and it had to become one of your casualties of the day? What's more, my microphone's battery ran dry inside Neway, so I wanted to go out and asked for assistance from the workers there. However, he was kind enough to lend me his and I was reluctant to accept because, I knew that his hands were still oily.

It was one of my worst karaoke session as i had stuffy nose and irritable throat. My voice coordination, tonalisation, vocal range and maintenance got distorted real bad. Couldn't even sing a line without flaw. After the nightmare, I got a bottle of wheat grass juice and met an AIMST Biotechnology student there. I could recognise him because I managed his application when I was working part time at AIMST. After courteous words, I headed straight back home waiting for Auntie Yang to come over to Maple together.

Saturday, 22nd May 2010 - Stayed home the whole day just Mapling and Facebook-ing. At night, I went dinner with my family somewhere opposite Sungai Ara secondary school. I forgot the restaurant's name but it was a place designed for family course dinner type or should I say "makan table" (in Hokkien we say "ciak tok" or "chu char") type. I saw 3 huu's there but of course they're untouchable. The food wasn't bad. Price - versatile as it was affordable. RM 53 for the following food:

Ku Chai Cii

Grape Pork Rib

Otak-Otak~

Yaw Mak~

Saw 2 bright stars but this is fainter than the next

Sunday, 23rd May 2010 - Helped my mother to mop the floor then had simple leftover food lunch at home. My grandmother suddenly called and I overheard something about property related stuff. I thought to myself, "chiao keh huey" again! My goodness, are humans that materialistic and realistic? Cibai!! Take one of my relatives' family for instance, His near-to-million house was actually purchased by my grandmother, but it was under His name because my grandmother thought that at least THEIR parents deserve to have a house. Does anybody think that He will acknowledge that it was my grandmother who bought the house? NO!! He will sure keep it for His puki selfish Self.

Now, that He already had that house with Him, why does He want to ask for shares of other properties? He does not share His house with anyone. And His wife didn't know about the house being my grandmother's and that her Husband was just a parasite puppet. His wife was even damn annoyed when other people (DIRECT descendants of the RIGHTFUL OWNER) stayed in the house. His children were ignorant of such a thing as well. They took everything for granted and now His wife hates my mother and I for what reason I'm not sure, but what did we do wrong? I actually liked His wife. His wife was my favourite aunt but I don't understand why she wanted to treat us like that. She had her share of fortune and went around the world. Same goes for her children. Could you all not just leave us in peace?

That was just a small part of a lengthy story that I would not suffer to share at the moment because I'm never as greedy as they are. Anyway, I had a short chat with one of my juniors out of boredom and I'm glad I did. I learnt not only about his personality but also about life. Understanding him better gave me a way of looking at certain things.

I had dinner alone tonight as both my parents were off to a wedding dinner in Raja Uda. They asked me to go along but I refused. Well, it's because I would feel very pressured if ever I were to encounter good-looking people. Felt myself being very ugly. Depression. It also brings a lot of unwanted memories from the past, of the people that hurt me. Felt like I don't belong here. I couldn't it in well.

my humble dinner~

Oooh~
No one seems to think too much of me here
and they're glad to tell it to my face
And they're right I'm not supposed to be here
I'm completely out of place
Somehow there has got to be a reason
Even as I try to think it through
There's a bolt from the blue

And I see a Shooting Star~
Set apart from all the rest
While the other stars are standing still
He's on a quest
Every night this Shooting Star ~
Dance across the twilight sky
Cause he knows he doesn't quite fit in
And he's longing to know why~

I feel so much better when it's night time
That's when I can sort of disappear
When the sun is set and it's the right time
For pretending I'm not here
Sometimes I just stare into the heavens
Wondering if the answer is inside
That's when I see the light

Of myself that Shooting Star~
On his way to who knows where
He's so unlike all the stars
But he outshines out there
And the solitary star
Is an awful lot like me
On an endless search in time and space
For a place that won't seem wrong

If we both hang on for long enough
We both somehow are strong enough
We'll find out where we belong

Every night this Shooting Star~
Dance across the twilight sky
Cause he knows he doesn't quite fit in
And he's longing to know why~

Infection Recovery...

I had been having sore throat and nasal congestion for the past two days and had been surviving on pseudoephedrine once a day. This morning I woke up with a partial euphoric feeling. It if very difficult to be described but it always comes when I am about to recover (i.e. on the eve of the day I fully recover from a sickness). It was a little strange to see that there was a steaming pot on my kitchen stove. I thought my parents must have been cleaning the pot and had no where to put so they put it on top of the stove.


I made some oat with milk for my breakfast (yes, Nestum oat with COLD pasturised milk - I just love the taste and texture). Then I posted something about me feeling partially euphoric in Facebook which later was commented by little Bern that I did not "ajak" her along. I was a little stunned to read that. Why would somebody want to be sick together? Finished breakfast, I cleaned my mug and walked past the steaming pot. I saw part of the steaming pot missing and realised that the steaming pot actually used that morning.


I opened up the pot and saw a plate of steamed minced pork with egg. I thought it must be my father who cooked it for my breakfast. So I thought I'd just have double-strength breakfast then. Without much hesitation, I took my favourite spoon and started digging into the pork. It was a little hard and dry unlike the one i used to prepare which was soft and tender and moist. Also, it lacked the "chor" (vinegar) that I would add to make it sour and vinegar-ish (my mother actually labeled me mad for doing that). Trust me, if you love vinegar or sourish stuff, then it is wonderful. It is also more fragrant this way.

I ate like a swine as I was half eating half chatting with Mr. TYY, Ms. World, Auntie Yang and Ms. Global. Out of thin air, there was an SMS from a guy called Milky and I had to entertain that also as he seemed to be chatting with me. Once I was done with my second breakfast, I did the dishes and went back to my seat. How coincidentally, my mobile phone's battery ran dry and I had to charge, so I took the adapter and was about to insert it into the nearest adapter. However, I found out that the adapter was occupied by the rice-cooker, and it was still switched on. I thought my mother forgot to switch it off since Sunday!! But then, as I looked closer, someone cooked a pot of rice.



The rice was supposed to be eaten with the steamed pork and they were actually my lunch for today. Too late. I just hoped that my dad would bring back some side dishes so that I could eat them with plain white rice. In the end, my dad called and he said he would buy "eng chai" (convolvulus), but it ended up to be something else I dislike. No choice but to eat it.

instead of convolvulus, he bought this~

My first week of holidays had gone by just like that. Many people had been traveling here and there. My good friends went to Hong Kong during my final exams period and they seemed to enjoy the trip very much. When I met up with them, there were endless stories of Hong Kong this Hong Kong that. Even on the day they just returned from Hong Kong, someone actually reported to me how it was like. Efficient eh? I had to thank them also for bringing back souvenirs from that land for me and my best friend.

Goodbye Year 3... I'm Still Not Free...

Goodbye to year 3... I'm kinda glad this semester as well as this year is over, but I'm not happy that I've gained a year older too :(... Well, the third year in this course is not an easy one for me. The first semester was hell!! I was distracted by some people, trying too hard to blend in with them, and in the end, I flunk my exams. The second semester was in a way relatively better but never much improvement.

Academically, this semester required us to take 5 subjects altogether: Pharmaceutical Analysis, Hospital Pharmacy, Pharmacology III, Applied Therapeutics, and Research Project. Hospital Pharmacy was supposedly a subject I should like, however, it was boring and somehow not too much of my type of subject suddenly. Pharmacology III, as expected, I love it. This time, it focused on CNS Pharmacotherapy & Antimicrobial Therapy. Pharmaceutical Analysis is the subject I dread most as it is the most technical & most industrial in this semester. Last but not least, the 4-credit-hour sinister Applied Therapeutics... You can say that I like it but I'm not good in it. Imagine, having to study all in one semester while UCSI students study Pharmacotherapy I & Pharmacotherapy II in 2 separate semesters...

4 packs big, 2 packs small + heh ci + poh pia

White Queen Laksa


Heh ci + Poh pia

The Research Project took a big toll on us. I was in a group together with Shirvine as our leader and Wei Yan, and guess what? We're under the supervision of the legendary Ms. Dayana. Our research was on Drug-Drug Interactions and we were to go to the hospital to collect data from patients' prescriptions. Other than prescriptions of patients, we have to collect every essential history of the patient, i.e. patient social history, medication history, complaints, radiographic records, laboratory records, temperature, blood pressure & other related readings. In one month, the Princess asked us to collect more than 100 patient case sheets. Well, Bernice's group has to collect more than 300, but I'm not sure whether they include every single patient history or not. What is more demanding, that Princess asked us to go to the ward and interview the patient directly. How could we do sooooooooooo many things in one month? We were only allocated three days to go to the hospital, and there were so many things to copy since that Princess asked us to copy EVERYTHING be it useful or useless.

What's worse, the Princess blamed us for not being serious and not being responsible to go to the hospital even during weekends. I was even told by the pharmacist that we should adhere to closely to the statement that we only to go to the pharmacy to collect our data according to the application letter that was stated 3 days a week. How nice, during weekends, the pharmacists are not around, so how are we supposed to access the database? Moreover, there was only one pharmacist kind enough to help us - the Clinical Pharmacist, Ms. Chai Nyen Chiaw. There were some "windy" pharmacists as well who were those typical high-heels wearer, with curly Maggi-type permed hair with a big queenly attitude. Approach them on a bad windy weather and you'll end up in the tornado vortex. There was also one legendary fierce & fearsome ICU pharmacist called Ms. Tang Yi Woei, though she could be friendly sometimes. Strict I should say.

Actually, the Princess didn't really guide us on what to do, so we just relied on books to tell us about drug interaction, yes, it was her idea to conduct this research. All our ideas were rejected completely and totally. We had no other choice but just to keep up with her nonsense. Frankly speaking, I do not really know what I was doing until the end of the research. We ended up doing the research badly according to Mr. Nazeer Ali. During the presentation, we were shot with many unanswerable questions because we were not well prepared. It was our first time doing such a research and Mr. Nazeer Ali was right about us not knowing what we were doing. The only thing I learnt from this were just some simple drug-drug interactions and that we were supposed to do more reading. Also, one "BIG" secret I found out from this research is that, our beloved Princess does not know anything about research, let alone therapeutics and unit-dosing.
The research did actually help me answer a 1-mark question in my Applied Therapeutics final exam, that is the interaction between a sulphonylurea and beta-blocker.

Chinese New Year 2010 was quite a relaxing one for me as I didn't have to do too many things XD. Also, I did not have to visit too many relatives. Reunion dinners were as boring as usual but mahjong is a different story XD. I skipped quite a lot of lectures during the 15 days of CNY. This year, instead of my mother, I invited some of my good friends for "makan" during the 7th day of CNY. My parents were off to Thailand to help my grandmother to pray to "Thi Kong" while I remained here hosting the feast. No pictures to show yet because Ms. World hadn't send me the pictures we took that night. Anyway Ms. World & Dr. Machine Lim were there, Ms. Earth and Ms. Global were also there. Not forgetting Chin Leng, Keat Suk Suk & Auntie Yang. My cousin, Pang Har was also there. Pang Har & I left for a while in the middle of the feast to attend our nephew's birthday. Other CNY activities include going to Chew Jetty with Ms. World & Dr. Machine Lim, praying "362" ("Kwan Imm Mah" - Goddess of Mercy) and also "Tua Pek Kong" ("007"), watching all CNY movies with Pang Har (best of them were 72 Tenants of Prosperity & 14 Blades), went Raja Uda to pray "Tuu Boh Kong" with Ms. World and Auntie Yang.

Tua Pek Kong amm

Chew Jetty

pai Thi Kong... cheng sim lo... XD

Ms. World & Auntie Yang on ferry to BW...

Delicious Raja Uda Chicken Rice... must try...

Life outside academics were dull as usual. Well, what do you expect in SP and in AIMST? My best friend had to "pang har" (放下) me and go to Alor Star for her final year. Even more difficult for me to live my life. Hence I went back to Penang every weekend except for one weekend only. However, there were some good-looking juniors and new intake students nonetheless :p but no use - can see cannot touch. Life with coursemates were as usual. I still couldn't forget the wounds inflicted by two people I initially trusted and had high views upon. It took me one month to forget them during my semester break in January 2010, however, it was revived unintentionally by one of my few remaining close friends in AIMST. Couldn't blame anyone except me. I expected it to be personality disorder or bipolar disorder but I was diagnosed by Dr. Machine Lim of having mild depression. Still, life during that semester was more enjoyable than the previous - having duck rice at "569 Street", laksa at Shell Petrol Station, Hakka Mee, and "How To Train Your Dragon" with 2 of my close friends.

During this period of time, I was also romantically involved in a relationship with someone, but I ended it because it was a love triangle. Depression starts thereafter. I know I'm not good looking nor attractive and my age is catching up on me. For people of my path, life stops after 30, hence if I don't find someone soon, I'm gonna end up dying alone by myself. What is worse, each person I fall for seems to either been attached or attached one day right before I pop the question. I need to talk to someone about this, but nobody is going to listen. Nor can they understand what I'm going through. They are either too absorbed in their own sorrows or doesn't even care a single bit. I even got flares and teases as a reward from various people including my coursemate and my junior. Dr. Machine Lim, prescribe me some medications please?

This song is dedicated to my PTYC... If I had the chance, I would sing you this...
我这里天快要黑了那里呢
我这里天气凉凉的那里呢
我这里一切都变了我变得懂事了
我又开始写日记了而那你呢

我这里天快要亮了那里呢
我这里天气很炎热那里呢
我这里一切都变了我变得不哭了
我把照片都收起了而那你呢

如果我们现在还在一起会是怎样
我们是不是还是深爱着对方
像开始时那样
握着手就算天快亮

我们现在还在一起会是怎样
我们是不是还是隐瞒着对方
像结束时那样
明知道你没有错
还硬要我原谅

我不会原谅我怎么原谅